I have now officially forgiven myself for not qualifying for Boston at the 2003 Mad City Marathon. Thank you, September 10th, 2006.
It took not bonking in that IM marathon to make me appreciate that I just wasn't mature enough to run that marathon back in 2003.
I didn't know the first thing about nutrition. I drank water sparingly. I had not met GU or Clif. Even Gatorade & I didn't have a meaningful relationship.
I overtrained for it. I was anxious to get started and so started the 18-week program 27 weeks out. How did I do this? I did the first 9 weeks and then re-started the whole thing all over again. This had the unhappy result of a peak in late April/early May - which I was way too high to recognize.
Then race day came and I screwed up again. I wanted it so bad. I was sure I was going to have it too. I counted on it. I went out fast. I ran a lifetime best half-marathon and then bonked at mile 16.
This race report is being written 3 years after the fact, but it isn't late. This is the first time I can really see that event. My confidence as an athlete was shaken. I finished that race, but crossing that finish line, I felt as horrible as I've ever felt in my life. I was 12 minutes too late. And it was my fault.
I coached myself to be stoic, to take it in stride, to learn from it. Read: I boxed it up. I never allowed myself to admit that I was angry and hurt and downright defeated. But I was.
That 2003 ghost haunted me as I ran during Ironman. I kept waiting for the hammer to fall, for me to feel like shit and hate the day I'd signed up for this thing. For it to cost too much to just finish. But it never came. I got stronger instead of weaker.
I don't know what ever gave me the chutzpah to sign up for Ironman, but I'm so glad I did. Cuz it has given me yet another gift.
I did an Ironman. In Madison. And I didn't bonk during the marathon.
I am forgiven.
4 comments:
NOt to far behind from qualifying for Boston. It should be no problem for a wise IronMan these days. Rest up.
Good job on the swim also.
That's awesome. I would love suggestions for going long since the farthest I've gone is Olympic. I definitely need to learn about pacing and nutrition.
P.S. It comforts me to know there are other long/lean/fit triathletes out there with a pooch. I love Michellie Jones. I'll have to look at her pics again b/c I've never even noticed her tummy!
I am so with you on that one, except I bonked at my marathon in 2004. Yes I overtrained. Yes I wanted it so bad, I burned myself up trying to get myself below pace by the halfway point. I finished by running the last 3 miles in over 30 minutes. And I was 10 minutes late. I boxed it up, but will be opening that box back up soon.
I'm lucky I was able to pull myself up before I totally bonked at IM. Lesson learned from my half in the summer.
By the way, I was signed up for Mad City '03. Even have a t-shirt from that race. Was all set to run that one. Six weeks before race day, I was shut down because of knee and ITB pain. Didn't run again till August of '03.
Hmm, Mad City Marathon in '07?
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